Words again...

In a sudden flash of realization that words, whether written, read or spoken are a form of solace for any and everyone!

For some its reading their favourite psalm from the bible, for some its a verse from their favourite poem or a letter from their sweetheart. For a few its the comfort of spewing their emotions on paper or for that matter web space. And yet others feel better when they talk about what they are going through or maybe even talk about anything at all. Most commonly people would need to hear words of comfort.

Its so strange...the power of mere words. Although they affect the actual situation in no way. It is pleasant to drown in the relief that they provide and let them ease away all that's troubling us. But I wonder whether they are just another form of escape from actually facing the situation or do they act as medicine for the lacerations when handling life. Then again I remember... Sometimes its these very words that can leave you scarred for life!

Just us...

A thousand words are not enough for all that I want to say to you,

Eternity is not long enough for the time I want to spend with you,

But in this world where those things are hard to come by,

I will be happy with but a smile and and a moment where our eyes speak...

pal..

aisi kuch baatein hai jo jaan kar bi anjaani hai..

aise kuch shaqs jo anjaan hai par pehchaane hai..

aise hi kuch pal jo apne hai...fir bhi begaane hai..

Khamoshi..

Khamoshiyon ko padhne ki jurrat na ki humne,

Hichkichahat ne thaam rakha tha mann ko,

Zabaan toh sambhal gayi humse,

Dil anjaane mein phisal gaya...

Experience..

Age and experience are supposed to make us wiser...
But from what I see they just make us bitter, cynical or nostalgic...
*sigh*

Wake Up Sid

An extremely refreshing urban romance in the midst of the transition in the life of a boy who finally assumes his responsibilities and becomes a man. The character sketches were perfectly cast and brilliantly executed, with - Supriya Pathak as the shyly doting mother, Anupam Kher as the disappointed father, Ranbir Kapoor as the spoilt brat of a son and Konkona Sen as the strong-willed girl next door, who wants to make it on her own right.

The chemistry between Konkona Sen and Ranbir Kapoor is uniquely charming and immediately strikes a chord! The seamless romance which manifests in the proceedings of the film itself keeps you smiling throughout the movie.

Great pictorial tribute to Mumbai, the erstwhile Bombay. Despite this, the flavour of the experience is tainted in the fact that objections can be raised on trivial issues such as using the older version of the city's name in a couple of dialogs.

All in all a good watch...2 and a half hours well spent...


A brilliant song from the movie....

The Window Slightly Ajar...

Dearest,

All this while, we have been estranged, there have been oceans of thoughts i have wanted to share with you. Things I would not normally share with anyone but would feel completely natural to let you know exactly what I am thinking at that precise moment.

Primarily amongst these, is the realization that my past associations, including the one with you, have been so strong that they in some way colour my present and will colour my future relationships as well. In this process of moving ahead, wherein I needed to shut shop entirely, there has remained a window that is ever so slightly ajar. This window in me which remains ajar is enmeshed in a time warp of such intensity that it insists on never letting me be whole again.

Now, emotional ambiguity prevails predominantly! In every action, reaction, relation, elation; there is a void....a vacuum that can't be filled...not even by your presence. I need someone capable enough to withstand the time warp to shut that last window, that's ever so slightly ajar.....Therein lies my salvation...

Yours....

My friend, Sancho

Its not the greatest literary achievement, but in the midst of an average story, Varma has hidden some amazing gems, that make me want to see where he can take his next book.

A few brillant pieces from Amit Varma's debut "My Friend, Sancho"....

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In the red corner, Heart. In the blue corner, Brain. The bell rings. Brain steps out and weaves in a cerebral manner, footwork assured, technique impeccable. Heart, saunters out, belches and swings wildly. A few seconds later, Brain is on the floor, trying to breathe. Heart, like a WWF wrestler, climbs onto the ropes at the side of the ring and dives onto Brain, elbow first. Brain goes into coma. Heart raises arms triumphant over an enemy that never had a chance in the first place.

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My house was a mess, as it always is: some mornings I wake up and have trouble finding myself. Abir, Abir, I shout, as I go from room to room, No success. Then I go through the day feeling disjointed, and when I finally do find myself, it’s when I wasn’t looking. Whatever.

Also has a good blog -- worth a read >> India Uncut

*Next Life** **by Woody Allen*

In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way.

Then you wake up in an old people's home feeling better every day.

You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then

when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day.

You work for 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement.

You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous,

then you are ready for high school.

You then go to primary school, you become a kid, you play. You have no responsibilities; you
become a baby until you are born.

And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa like conditions with central heating and

room service on tap, larger quarters every day and then...

Voila!
.
.
.

You finish off as an orgasm!


I rest my case!!!
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This makes more sense than anything I've ever read!

Conclusion....

A snippet which ended an era in my life....

Me: Truth of life personified...
"We make them cry who care for us,
we cry for them who will never care for us,
and we care for them who will never cry for us"

He: "Never be sad for missing whatever you expected..
instead be happy that God made you realize that
those expectations weren't worth your life"
Seems true enough i guess...bye!

Me: If only it was....Bye!

He: It always is...None of us accept it openly..but its true..
I know I'm the wrong person to be saying this..
But.. EXPECT NOTHING!!
Shambho Mahadeva...

Laburnums

Outside my window a laburnum tree depictive of our relationship...

Shriveled leaves in trepidation of a gust...

pendulous flowers harbingers of life interrupted not ended...

A pledge of continuity in the golden lacy clusters

To wallow and not extricate is the bane.....

To extricate and debase is the fate.....

Once over an done with I qualify for grace....

Video Games just passed me by…

Today, you would be hard put to find a person who has not played Video games or computer games in their life, not specifically childhood, but any point of time in life. Well look no further for you have found your specimen!

While all my peers speak excitedly about the “NFS Carbon” (I don’t even know whether I’ve got the name right!) and “World of War craft” I stand by with no resource for input to the conversation! Friends have all-night LAN gaming parties where I have to either feign disinterest or risk a scandalized barrage of “What do you mean you’ve NEVER played video games !!!???”

To give some background, I work with an Internet Marketing firm thus making websites of radically different genres, types and purpose a part of my daily life. I recently had to work on this website called fatgamer.com, which is an e-commerce that sells Video Game Accessories at discounted prices. Well when I initially studied the website, it was more alien than Greek and Latin to me! Nintendo Wii, PS3, Xbox 360, PSP et al and my head was spinning. Of course I’d HEARD these names before, but to write about these and work on them is all together a different ball-game!

Well, left with no alternative I took it head on! Gaming Magazines became by bedside reading, I actually went to Croma to understand firsthand the difference between the graphics of the PS3 and Xbox 360 and spent hours researching the net for material. After all that homework I put myself to test…I tried to conduct a conversation about this stuff with my 12 year old cousin. My result??? Success!! I actually managed without falling on my face, he now actually considers me an authority on it! He..he.. that’s how much he knows!

Well my job on the site is done an passed on to other hands, but it has left me with one addition to my wish list! My very own PS3 games!!

In the eye of the beholder

Boredom is rampant today where attention spans last micro seconds and todays new got old yesterday. My threshold for the same is very low as most of my generation. It was time to alleviate this reccuring boredom which is slave to distractions. Indeed it was!
People and places are a fascinating subject!
There kick in the complaints...
"I dont have the time".."I'm too busy"..."Travelling nowadys is such a pain"..et al..

But I say you dont need the time all you need is your normal life.
We all travel to our place of work or study...run small errands for home or atleast go shopping!
Look around observe, the world is new each time you look at it!
Take a new route to a familiar place, reach there by a different means of transport..Look around you is a place of beauty that is uniqe, like no other! Isn't that what we look for each time?
My answer to places and travel is a poem my cousin once wrote..

I see beauty in the overcast sky
I see beauty in the rabbits eye..

At this juncture I'm going to make a statement- People are fascinating.(period)
There is a story with each person and in every conversation. A wonderful new horizon better than a book of stories is open to you. The variety of joys, sorrows, problems and events that you get a peek into within a window of a 10 minute conversation is phenomenal. Apart from the appreciation of the human spirit you develop another gift is the value of your life and the conveniences we usually take for granted.
These two observations in place....I'm never bored now!!

Extract

There are days when sorrow is like a physical ache. Under your skin, its is a soiled washcloth the surgeon left inside before sewing you up. In your bloodstream, it’s a murky grey fluid, an effluent without an outlet. Inside your ribcage, it is the deadweight of despair. Even neon seems dim, music grates. People are talking to you, but all want is for them to go. Their concerns are trite, banal, pointless, compared to the grief that you cannot share with anyone. There are such griefs and they are most terrible.

At this precise point of time, happiness may seem a myth, a chimera, a bedtime story for children, a poor urban legend. When were you happy last? Yesterday? The day before? Yes, you can remember those times, those moments, but you cant believe it was you. It was another person, yes. It was another world. Here, now, this moment, you can never be happy.

You make a list. You start small: mundane happiness’s, commonplace joys and random unplanned delights in a world where happiness was allowed. Lying about in a meadow in the winter sun. The caress of a river breeze on your face. Getting wet in the rain after seven years. Cuddling up with someone you love under the quilt.

But memories of happiness can hurt too. Can you ever go back to those moments and experience them again, now, with the knowledge of what comes after? Will the sky ever be as azure as it was on that winter day 10 years ago? The quilt may be the same, but you could be alone.

Happiness happens. But the patterns of its arrival are random, and its departures are staggeringly unexpected. It knows no reason and follows no apparent logic. Causality can be established, but you know that introspection and analysis often spoil it. It can be a warm light, it can be a cool blue. Anticipation can be it, so can afterglow. Bliss is doing nothing at all but it can also be working at a feverish pace. But most of all, right no, for you, happiness appears.

A sleeping child, a warm puppy, a mother’s lap. Two rainbows in the same sky and animals hiding in the clouds. The first snowfall, the last love of your lfe. Ducklings waddling down to the pond, the sighting of dolphins.

People find happiness all the time, You know that. P.G.Wodehouse and the Pickwick Papers. M.S.Subalakshmi singing Suprabhatam in the morning. Vintage Kishore Kumare on the car stereo at 100kmph on the highway. The Lion King from Hollywood and Munnabhai MBBS from Mumbai.

But why do you need to be happy? Why do you crave for it, if the only thing you know for sure about happiness is the inevitability of betrayal? Happiness won’t last, it will leave, without even the courtesy of a wave goodbye. Did not one of your professors once tell you that creativity is directly proportional to the amount of tragedy you hold in your heart? What sort of pictures could a Vincent Van Gogh with his soul at ease paint? What is the big deal about happiness? From your limited knowledge of the world’s major religions, you have a sense that most messiahs have spoken about the peace of mind, rather than happiness. You could be wrong, but that’s the notion you have.

This place seems strange to me after such a long hiatus. I will have to refill it with ME!!
but strange as it may be..it is also strangely familiar..

the peaches and ice-cream still make my mouth water..

I'M BACK!!

UP AND AT 'EM....ATOM ANT!!!!

I haven't been here or to any of the blogs I frequent for quite a while now...
& am going to be away for longer...
when I start visiting your blogs again...thats going to be a while given my screwed up schedule..
that will mean I'm back on the blogging scene!!

Thanks and Regards...

P.S: I really hope I'll see all of you people around again when I come back..please please!!

Cheers! and Ciao!!

Dheeme se naseem mein aagaz hai teri,
Samandar ki mauj mein ehsaas hai teri;
Kaliyon ke rang mein muskaan hai teri,
Mere in lafzon mein hi pehchaan hai teri..

Memoir in six words

Celebrating the vacuum between insanity and illusion..

Silsila Suron Ka

I experienced a rare treat yesterday, two of the greatest instrumental maestros of Indian Classical Music performing together after seven long years.
Pandit Shiv Kumar Sharma on the Santoor and Pandit HariPrasad Chaurasia with the flute created magic yet again like in their album "The Valley Recalls".
It was quite by chance that I was able to go and I really thank the heavens for it. Each of these maestros are synonymous with the instruments they play. They have elevated the status of their respective instruments and classical music world over and also retained the sanctity of their art.
The performance was organized by CRPIM(Center for Research and Promotion of Indian Music) along with Perfect Octave at Shanmukhananda Hall, Matunga. The program was divided into three one hour segments.





First there was performance by Pt. Shiv Kumar Sharma on the Santoor accompanied by Ustaad Bhawani Shankar on the Pakhawaj, a percussion instrument- ancestor to the tabla. The rippling river like sounds of the santoor and the resounding sharp beats of the pakhawaj complemented each other beautifully reminding one of a river with a rocky bed close to a waterfall.
Shiv Kumar Sharma started an aalaap in raag Madhuvanti which Ustaad Bhawani Shankar built up to a jod, slowly leading the concert into a beautiful cresendo.







The second performance was by Pandit Hari Prasad Chaurasia accompanies by Vijay Ghate on the tabla and Santosh Shank supporting on the flute. Panditji played a beautiful composition in raag Maruvihaag, which he jokingly proclaimed as "mera vihaag". The bansuri (flute) sounded like molten jaggery with all its sweetness overflowing. He led tabalchi Vijay Ghate a merry dance when they began the jugalbandi, but the latter manfully held his own to hearty applause.

The third and final segment was indeed a treat like I have earlier called it. Shiv Kumar Sharma began, sitting beside Chaurasia, dedicating the jugalbandi and performance to their age old friendship, claiming that it was not restricted by mortal life. There was an expectant taste in the body of the audience. The stage looked like a gathering of old friends, Sharma, Chaurasia, Ghate and Bhawani Shankar, great instrumentalists in their own right playing together creating a symphony, yet giving each other space. It was an hour and a half of pure rapture indescribable in words. They played primarily in raag Khamaj keeping it lightly classical with a little mixing of raagas. They teased, challenged and complimented each other drawing the audience completely into their performance. They enjoyed themselves thoroughly and that same joy was transmuted to the audience.
They received a unanimous standing ovation from an audience of around 15oo.
This was undoubtedly one of the most memorable evening of my life.